Stories and thoughts about family and life

12 going on 20

on June 14, 2015

I often joke with my friends that I need a film crew following me around.  I’m sure I’d be the equivalent of some “Friends” or “Seinfeld” style acceptance of my “nothing special” life (only, it’s all pretty special, if mundane some days).  Anyway, as a mom of a teenager and a tween (he’ll be 13 in December), we’re gradually wading into more and more serious new territory.

It all started one evening when one of my boys was on his phone just after curfew.  I reminded him what time it was and asked him to text whomever it was and tell them that it was curfew and he was to turn over his phone.  Once he did, I decided to glance through his text messages.  What I found amazed me.

First, the boys aren’t allowed to download apps without our approval.  Error number one–there was a new app on his phone called Oovoo.  Once I logged into their conversation and started reading, I was amazed.  The girl with whom he had been chatting asked him to “send sexy pictures” and meet her at the building near their school “in a room with no cameras.”   She pushed and pushed to get him to play along, and I have to admit I was amused and a bit relieved to see that he didn’t understand some of the conversation.  When she asked for a sexy picture, he just sent her a head shot.  She had to guide him in what she wanted.  Still, though, the level of conversation this girl was having with my son was concerning to say the very least.

I’ve had my friends with older boys tell me that the girls nowadays are fast, but I don’t think I really appreciated what they were trying to tell me.  She wouldn’t speak to him anymore after I told him I wanted to talk to her Mom.  I’m so glad school is out and we’ll have a break for a bit, but I don’t think this girl understands what she’s getting herself into.

When I was that age, I remember thinking that a boy was cute or hoping for some attention, but nothing nearly on this scale. It makes a parent acutely aware of the constant access to information and other communications kids experience now.  We had to sit our marginally naive son down and have “the talk” again, and discuss internet safety for the umpteenth time.  He thinks because this girl has shown interest in him, that it’s okay.  We’ve had to explain to him that her numerous texts referencing him as a “secret” boyfriend should indicate to him that he’s likely not the only boy she’s acting this way around.

Is love already blind?


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